JC was holding up a pair of Y-fronts that were surely too big for AJ's skinny frame, and looking indignant. "What's with the baggy underpants, man?"
Damn it, he knew he should have gotten to the laundry first. "I need. I needtomakesureitdoesn'tfallout," AJ mumbled.
JC, not unpredictably, looked horrified, and dropped the underpants.
"Not that! I mean, no! It's—look, I told you about the eggs. Last thing I need is to have one of those things sliding down my pants leg and breaking on the floor. Those," he gestured towards them, "catch them. The first two times, I had boxers on, and they just fell right out. Made a helluva mess."
"You know," JC said in a conversational tone, "if you keep insisting that you lay eggs I am going to get the men in white coats to take you away." He grabbed a handful of coloreds from the laundry basket and stuffed everything unceremoniously into the machine. "Seriously, man. Cut it out. It's old already."
"I can prove it. Come on." AJ grabbed his man by the left wrist and dragged him through into the kitchen. "Sit there." He opened the refrigerator and reached inside for an egg. The familiar itching sensation fizzed through his skin, and he felt the tickle building inside his nose, until—"AaaaatCHOO!" The egg in his hand flew into the air, and JC caught it reflexively and set it down on the countertop.
"Gesundheit," said JC. "Oh, and by the way, if that was supposed to be a demonstration, I think your idea of 'laid' needs some work."
AJ ignored him. "Man," he muttered, "that feels weird." He shimmied. The freshly laid egg wobbled against his buttocks, and he unzipped his pants and waggled his butt towards JC. "Take it. Go on, take it."
Nothing happened. AJ stared over his shoulder. JC's glazed eyes were focussed on the bulge in the back of AJ's briefs, and his face was frozen with horror.
AJ sighed and reached around. "Look," he said, putting the egg on the counter top next to the first one, "it's just an egg, okay?"
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Damn it, he knew he should have gotten to the laundry first. "I need. I needtomakesureitdoesn'tfallout," AJ mumbled.
JC, not unpredictably, looked horrified, and dropped the underpants.
"Not that! I mean, no! It's—look, I told you about the eggs. Last thing I need is to have one of those things sliding down my pants leg and breaking on the floor. Those," he gestured towards them, "catch them. The first two times, I had boxers on, and they just fell right out. Made a helluva mess."
"You know," JC said in a conversational tone, "if you keep insisting that you lay eggs I am going to get the men in white coats to take you away." He grabbed a handful of coloreds from the laundry basket and stuffed everything unceremoniously into the machine. "Seriously, man. Cut it out. It's old already."
"I can prove it. Come on." AJ grabbed his man by the left wrist and dragged him through into the kitchen. "Sit there." He opened the refrigerator and reached inside for an egg. The familiar itching sensation fizzed through his skin, and he felt the tickle building inside his nose, until—"AaaaatCHOO!" The egg in his hand flew into the air, and JC caught it reflexively and set it down on the countertop.
"Gesundheit," said JC. "Oh, and by the way, if that was supposed to be a demonstration, I think your idea of 'laid' needs some work."
AJ ignored him. "Man," he muttered, "that feels weird." He shimmied. The freshly laid egg wobbled against his buttocks, and he unzipped his pants and waggled his butt towards JC. "Take it. Go on, take it."
Nothing happened. AJ stared over his shoulder. JC's glazed eyes were focussed on the bulge in the back of AJ's briefs, and his face was frozen with horror.
AJ sighed and reached around. "Look," he said, putting the egg on the counter top next to the first one, "it's just an egg, okay?"
JC slithered off his stool in a dead faint.