pensnest | Insanely, I meme

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Insanely, I meme

I saw this on

turps33's LJ, and thought... oh, why the hell not. So.

Name three fics you think I will never, ever, ever write. In return, I will attempt to write a snippet of one of them.

Bring it on.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

(3) it is, then.

"You know what? I don't think they keep the space bulls maintained like they ought. I mean, it's important, right? They have to be properly, like, oiled and everything, or they might go wrong during a show. What if one of them seized up when we were performing? Seriously, this is big. And I'm not just thinking up problems out of nowhere, because I happen to know that my bull is rusting on the inside, and it's just wrong. It's not like he'd ever seize up on me on purpose, but you know, if there's something not being oiled properly, I mean, I oil him, obviously, but—you know that bit right at the back, under the tail? Well, right there. I got rust on my dick. On my dick! I mean, if the bulls are getting rusted up inside, then chances are they're gonna go wrong and it'll be a disaster. Besides, they shouldn't have rust, it's not nice, you know?" He paused. Four pairs of eyes were staring at him in blank astonishment. "What? What?"

Lance cleared his throat. "JC? Do you, um, use a condom, when you—"

"A condom? No, of course not. It's not like my bull's been with other—or do you mean that he, that someone else—?"

"No, it's just—JC, if you're, um, you know, without a condom to, you know, keep things tidy—why d'you *think* it's getting rusted up in there?"