Pen's Nest

To me it's just formulaic.

It is and it's designed that way. Being Episcopal [by training, if you will] that service is found on pages so and so of the book of common prayer. Each religion has it's own book and pages. Because, for better or worse, death is a common thing. It's why they have the eulogy.

The assumption that you believe those things.... I dunno. I don't honestly think each church assumes funeral attendees believe the stuff in their service but that the person the funeral service is being read for believed them.

That being said, my personal beliefs are that funerals are for the living, a time for the survivors of that persons life to gather together. To mourn and remember and offer up their comfort to those affected most..... however that principal works for them. Your friends humanist gathering sounds quite lovely for those things. People should probably be more proactive in their own services within traditional church services as well, but don't like to think about death in that way.

I had to look up sub-fusc as I'd never heard it. lol. Black and navy blue still tend to be the call to order here, but honestly, the last funeral I went to was of an extended family member who took his own life quite suddenly.... none of us were feeling anything but black. Black is a very popular color here in the States for loads of things. Including weddings. I wonder how much of that plays into its continued popularity at funerals.