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pensnestOh, mother of god, why am I sitting here with the telly on? All I wanted to see were the pretty hats, and here are the BBC touring the country to talk to people about what nice people Wills and Kate are. Gimme hats!
Also the cat is looking extremely reproachful. The laptop is occupying my lap, natch, and she cannot also fit. Why the sudden urge to express affection I do not know, but she is purring at me.
Who are all those people who slept on the streets in order to - Jesus, what an array of cameras! - stand and wave.
Ooh, lady in the fabulous pink hat with yellow and turquoise feathers and a rich yellow dress, *applause*.
The military bands are presumably quite grateful that we haven't got the summery weather we had last week. Especially the ones in bearskins. Nice to see them parading.
Oh, Posh, why so subfusc? Cute hat, though, and the arm candy is looking very tasty. Very nice, Mr Beckham.
Lady in the peacock blue outfit with that tall, thin, hat - I don't like the style, but still, well done. So many colours! Ooh, a gent in a tiny pink hat. Not as stylish as the ladies, nor is his dress, but nice try.
Ah, the Prime Minister. Back to the fic, then. Oh Christ, Boris Johnson. Pillock. Theresa May looking very chic.
William in red, lovely and dramatic. Allthough, aesthetically speaking I think I prefer Prince Harry's get-up. This is actually kinda fun. I don't think I'd ever do the crowd thing, lining the route, but it's nice to have people there yelling and waving.
A parade of minibuses! How awesome is that!!! I love it.
Okay, now the cat has tucked herself under my arm. She has no interest in the wedding, at least, I don't think so, although she does seem to be watching the telly. Hmm.
Why is the Abbey full of trees? I mean, nothing wrong with that but, still, trees?
Ooh, lotsa royals in *serious* hats. Good for you, ladies. Why does Princess Michael of Kent's jacket not fit her properly? Lovely colour, though. Bwahaha, BBC announcer whose name I have forgotten sounds so totally ridiculous reciting the list of who designed which bit of the Duchess of Cornwall's outfit and trying to make it sound as though he cares.
I love that the Queen has a blue blankie over her legs. It must be quite a chilly morning. Why does the Queen carry a handbag? Tissues? Mobile phone? Wot? What can she possibly need that a flunky would not supply?
The one thing about Kate that - okay, that's three things. Wait, I'll come in again. Good car for showing off a bride, that.
Okay, that's a pretty bride. *sniffles* Lovely dress. She seems very poised even though she has the 'I can't stop' bridal smile. And Prince William has a little 'mustn't grin' smile happening there. Cute. Awwwwww, little "You look beautiful". Quite right, too. Aww. Dear me, I'm getting all mushy.
For richer, for poorer. Right. I suppose there *could* be a revolution, but today that doesn't really look very likely. Dear me, does the Archbishop have hat hair? He should have been lacquered. Yep, I'm getting cynical at the actual ceremony.
The Middleton boy is a nice looking lad, isn't he - and read well.
I like the Rutter tune. Words are a bit dull, but the sound is pretty.
Why are my feet cold while my top half is overheating? Why can I not persuade the cat to sit on my feet and make them warm? Why has my husband had refrigerated feet for the last three nights, requiring *me* to warm them for him? This is not a wifely task. Husbands are for the warming of wives' feet.
Huh. Rather dreary motet.
My glasses hurt. One of the little nose pad thingies came off, and the opticians were happy to replace both for me, but they aren't quite in the right place and of course there's no getting anything done about it today. :-( I have been wearing various of my *three* pairs of backup glasses that do the same as this pair - ie distance, computer and reading - but these are a lot handier.
Oh, I like 'Jerusalem'. How come half the congregation don't seem to know it!!! Shame on you, if you're British. So, are they singing along in Hyde Park, then? I think we should be told. Blimey, aren't they done yet?
Such perfectly scrubbed choirboys. So very cute.
I... wasn't expecting the national anthem. Not at a wedding. How bizarre it must be, to be accustomed to having people sing that about you. Oh, cat, have you come back to be a nuisance? Of course you have.
Did they explain why some of the choirboys are dressed like mini Beefeaters? I must have missed that.
It occurs to me that these dribbles of thought are perfectly suited to Twitter. But I don't twitter. Oh well, stream of consciousness journalling instead, who cares. That mosaic floor is rather wonderful especially from the high aerial view. I want to pet the choirboy with the missing tooth, his hair is so clean and fluffy. Why do adults always look in pain when singing this kind of thing? As if someone is grasping their intestines.
Now that's a useful hat - you can hide behind it and chat. The York princesses seem to have chosen rather silly hats and Glambert-esque levels of eye makeup. Ooh, I thought I spotted a female cleric. Good. This parade of clerics should have little labels. Surely we have the technology. OTOH, I suppose nobody cares.
Did the teeny tiny bridesmaids go and hide with their mums? I expect they were a bit staggered by the whole thing. Prince William looks as though he daren't smile in case he can't stop.
Good grief, the cameras. Couldn't they have just said, the BBC will do it very nicely... spose not.
Ah, carriages of bridesmaids, and pageboys, and Prince Harry. Excellent. I do like the Horse Guards. They must have been polishing for hours. I think they polished the horses, too. Blimey, the Queen's carriage rocks a bit, how heavy is the Duke of Edinburgh anyway? Built in 1830, wonder how uncomfortable it is.
Now, that *is* a parade. Ooh, the Queen looks animated! And there are coaches and minibuses again. Joy. Hee.
Okay, lots of boring talking to people who went to watch. Enough.
Also the cat is looking extremely reproachful. The laptop is occupying my lap, natch, and she cannot also fit. Why the sudden urge to express affection I do not know, but she is purring at me.
Who are all those people who slept on the streets in order to - Jesus, what an array of cameras! - stand and wave.
Ooh, lady in the fabulous pink hat with yellow and turquoise feathers and a rich yellow dress, *applause*.
The military bands are presumably quite grateful that we haven't got the summery weather we had last week. Especially the ones in bearskins. Nice to see them parading.
Oh, Posh, why so subfusc? Cute hat, though, and the arm candy is looking very tasty. Very nice, Mr Beckham.
Lady in the peacock blue outfit with that tall, thin, hat - I don't like the style, but still, well done. So many colours! Ooh, a gent in a tiny pink hat. Not as stylish as the ladies, nor is his dress, but nice try.
Ah, the Prime Minister. Back to the fic, then. Oh Christ, Boris Johnson. Pillock. Theresa May looking very chic.
William in red, lovely and dramatic. Allthough, aesthetically speaking I think I prefer Prince Harry's get-up. This is actually kinda fun. I don't think I'd ever do the crowd thing, lining the route, but it's nice to have people there yelling and waving.
A parade of minibuses! How awesome is that!!! I love it.
Okay, now the cat has tucked herself under my arm. She has no interest in the wedding, at least, I don't think so, although she does seem to be watching the telly. Hmm.
Why is the Abbey full of trees? I mean, nothing wrong with that but, still, trees?
Ooh, lotsa royals in *serious* hats. Good for you, ladies. Why does Princess Michael of Kent's jacket not fit her properly? Lovely colour, though. Bwahaha, BBC announcer whose name I have forgotten sounds so totally ridiculous reciting the list of who designed which bit of the Duchess of Cornwall's outfit and trying to make it sound as though he cares.
I love that the Queen has a blue blankie over her legs. It must be quite a chilly morning. Why does the Queen carry a handbag? Tissues? Mobile phone? Wot? What can she possibly need that a flunky would not supply?
The one thing about Kate that - okay, that's three things. Wait, I'll come in again. Good car for showing off a bride, that.
Okay, that's a pretty bride. *sniffles* Lovely dress. She seems very poised even though she has the 'I can't stop' bridal smile. And Prince William has a little 'mustn't grin' smile happening there. Cute. Awwwwww, little "You look beautiful". Quite right, too. Aww. Dear me, I'm getting all mushy.
For richer, for poorer. Right. I suppose there *could* be a revolution, but today that doesn't really look very likely. Dear me, does the Archbishop have hat hair? He should have been lacquered. Yep, I'm getting cynical at the actual ceremony.
The Middleton boy is a nice looking lad, isn't he - and read well.
I like the Rutter tune. Words are a bit dull, but the sound is pretty.
Why are my feet cold while my top half is overheating? Why can I not persuade the cat to sit on my feet and make them warm? Why has my husband had refrigerated feet for the last three nights, requiring *me* to warm them for him? This is not a wifely task. Husbands are for the warming of wives' feet.
Huh. Rather dreary motet.
My glasses hurt. One of the little nose pad thingies came off, and the opticians were happy to replace both for me, but they aren't quite in the right place and of course there's no getting anything done about it today. :-( I have been wearing various of my *three* pairs of backup glasses that do the same as this pair - ie distance, computer and reading - but these are a lot handier.
Oh, I like 'Jerusalem'. How come half the congregation don't seem to know it!!! Shame on you, if you're British. So, are they singing along in Hyde Park, then? I think we should be told. Blimey, aren't they done yet?
Such perfectly scrubbed choirboys. So very cute.
I... wasn't expecting the national anthem. Not at a wedding. How bizarre it must be, to be accustomed to having people sing that about you. Oh, cat, have you come back to be a nuisance? Of course you have.
Did they explain why some of the choirboys are dressed like mini Beefeaters? I must have missed that.
It occurs to me that these dribbles of thought are perfectly suited to Twitter. But I don't twitter. Oh well, stream of consciousness journalling instead, who cares. That mosaic floor is rather wonderful especially from the high aerial view. I want to pet the choirboy with the missing tooth, his hair is so clean and fluffy. Why do adults always look in pain when singing this kind of thing? As if someone is grasping their intestines.
Now that's a useful hat - you can hide behind it and chat. The York princesses seem to have chosen rather silly hats and Glambert-esque levels of eye makeup. Ooh, I thought I spotted a female cleric. Good. This parade of clerics should have little labels. Surely we have the technology. OTOH, I suppose nobody cares.
Did the teeny tiny bridesmaids go and hide with their mums? I expect they were a bit staggered by the whole thing. Prince William looks as though he daren't smile in case he can't stop.
Good grief, the cameras. Couldn't they have just said, the BBC will do it very nicely... spose not.
Ah, carriages of bridesmaids, and pageboys, and Prince Harry. Excellent. I do like the Horse Guards. They must have been polishing for hours. I think they polished the horses, too. Blimey, the Queen's carriage rocks a bit, how heavy is the Duke of Edinburgh anyway? Built in 1830, wonder how uncomfortable it is.
Now, that *is* a parade. Ooh, the Queen looks animated! And there are coaches and minibuses again. Joy. Hee.
Okay, lots of boring talking to people who went to watch. Enough.