More Murderous Stuff
Jan. 10th, 2006 10:09 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
pensnestBun returns to Bristol today, but I just about have time to post this before we head west.
Suspicious Financial Circumstances
Money is a great motivator, and it is interesting to note the following circumstances
Sid Sneer
- as an employee and member of the grudging Mega, Inc share scheme, should have a mere handful of shares, but instead has 10,005
Lady Cynthia
- daughter of the Earl of Masham, who squandered his fortune on crippled racehorses instead of providing her with a suitable portion
- married a notorious skinflint
- yet manages to live a high-fashion lifestyle and wear designer clothes and hats
Horatio Goode
- is supposed to have 10,000 Mega, Inc shares but actually has 250
- has made regular transfers to a mysterious share account, the first of which
occurred on 24th November 2004
Maurice Bindweed
- recently acquired at auction the fabled Karona-Toggle collection of Lesser Western Railway Timetables, 1877-93, with a bid of £48,067.50
Magnolia Luscious
- is supposed to hold 5 Mega, Inc shares, but in fact holds 5,005.
Irma Hyphon-Smart
- has recently sold all but two of her Mega, Inc shares, but there is no sign of the proceeds in any of her known bank accounts
The Preliminary Interviews
with the suspects
Lady Cynthia
Sir Alfred suspected that there was a Spy in the Company. He had discovered that a meeting with Bob Zhairunkel, the Chairman of rival firm Acquisitions R Us, had taken place at five to midnight on 18th September 2005.
This was obviously the news Sir Alfred had been going to reveal, before his untimely demise prevented him doing so.
Lady Cynthia never went to the offices of Megalomania, Inc. She believes that Maurice Bindweed, Irma Hyphon-Smart and most particularly, Sid Sneer, are the persons most likely to be guilty of this horrible betrayal.
Sid Sneer
Flatly denies any attempt to betray Mega, Inc. Hoped to become the next Chairman, therefore it was not in his own interest to damage the company.
Irma Hyphon-Smart, however, was another matter. Everyone knew she wanted to leave.
Irma Hyphon-Smart
Admitted that she cherished ambitions to leave the sordid world of PR behind her and become a photo journalist.
Dismissive of suggestions that she might have been an industrial spy, Irma pointed out that Sir Alfred was an old-fashioned type (Note: actual words were 'bigoted capitalist pig') who had been shocked to discover that his wife's nephew was as gay as a maypole, and planned to expose this shameful secret. Therefore, it was in Horatio Goode's interests to kill Sir Alfred and shut him up, permanently. Not that the premature demise of a fascist lackey of the imperialist system is anything to mourn.
Horatio Goode
Thought everyone knew he was gay. Lady Cynthia always said that everyone who really matters knew, anyway. Nobody seemed to mind.
NB Cross-checking: Lady Cynthia confirms this.
Further cross-checking: Sid Sneer apparently unaware.
Further cross-checking: Lady Cynthia confirms that anyone who *matters* knew.
Magnolia Luscious
Does not believe Sir Alfred would have bothered much with Horatio Goode's private life. Underneath the gruff exterior, Sir Alfred was a teddybear.
Ms Luscious revealed that she had been Sir Alfred's mistress for some considerable time, and wept fetchingly into a lace handkerchief for several minutes before denying that she would ever harm a hair on the head of her dearest Alfred.
Believes Lady Cynthia killed Sir Alfred in order to get his money. There was a secret pre-nuptial agreement which would deny Lady Cynthia access to Sir Alfred's fortune if they were divorced.
Also, Maurice Bindweed entered the Library a few minutes before the shot was fired.
Maurice Bindweed
Only went into the Library to see whether Sir Alfred had yet finished with his paperknife, an object of some sentimental value to Mr Bindweed. But when he entered, Sir Alfred threw the inkpot at him and he left at once. Sir Alfred was obviously in a bad temper.
Dear me. Sordid revelations. All sorts of financial irregularities, and some rather suspicious little secrets. Everyone seems very keen to point an accusatory finger at someone else.
Doesn't look as though Sir Alfred had surrounded himself with friends for his last night alive, does it?
Suspicious Financial Circumstances
Money is a great motivator, and it is interesting to note the following circumstances
Sid Sneer
- as an employee and member of the grudging Mega, Inc share scheme, should have a mere handful of shares, but instead has 10,005
Lady Cynthia
- daughter of the Earl of Masham, who squandered his fortune on crippled racehorses instead of providing her with a suitable portion
- married a notorious skinflint
- yet manages to live a high-fashion lifestyle and wear designer clothes and hats
Horatio Goode
- is supposed to have 10,000 Mega, Inc shares but actually has 250
- has made regular transfers to a mysterious share account, the first of which
occurred on 24th November 2004
Maurice Bindweed
- recently acquired at auction the fabled Karona-Toggle collection of Lesser Western Railway Timetables, 1877-93, with a bid of £48,067.50
Magnolia Luscious
- is supposed to hold 5 Mega, Inc shares, but in fact holds 5,005.
Irma Hyphon-Smart
- has recently sold all but two of her Mega, Inc shares, but there is no sign of the proceeds in any of her known bank accounts
The Preliminary Interviews
with the suspects
Lady Cynthia
Sir Alfred suspected that there was a Spy in the Company. He had discovered that a meeting with Bob Zhairunkel, the Chairman of rival firm Acquisitions R Us, had taken place at five to midnight on 18th September 2005.
This was obviously the news Sir Alfred had been going to reveal, before his untimely demise prevented him doing so.
Lady Cynthia never went to the offices of Megalomania, Inc. She believes that Maurice Bindweed, Irma Hyphon-Smart and most particularly, Sid Sneer, are the persons most likely to be guilty of this horrible betrayal.
Sid Sneer
Flatly denies any attempt to betray Mega, Inc. Hoped to become the next Chairman, therefore it was not in his own interest to damage the company.
Irma Hyphon-Smart, however, was another matter. Everyone knew she wanted to leave.
Irma Hyphon-Smart
Admitted that she cherished ambitions to leave the sordid world of PR behind her and become a photo journalist.
Dismissive of suggestions that she might have been an industrial spy, Irma pointed out that Sir Alfred was an old-fashioned type (Note: actual words were 'bigoted capitalist pig') who had been shocked to discover that his wife's nephew was as gay as a maypole, and planned to expose this shameful secret. Therefore, it was in Horatio Goode's interests to kill Sir Alfred and shut him up, permanently. Not that the premature demise of a fascist lackey of the imperialist system is anything to mourn.
Horatio Goode
Thought everyone knew he was gay. Lady Cynthia always said that everyone who really matters knew, anyway. Nobody seemed to mind.
NB Cross-checking: Lady Cynthia confirms this.
Further cross-checking: Sid Sneer apparently unaware.
Further cross-checking: Lady Cynthia confirms that anyone who *matters* knew.
Magnolia Luscious
Does not believe Sir Alfred would have bothered much with Horatio Goode's private life. Underneath the gruff exterior, Sir Alfred was a teddybear.
Ms Luscious revealed that she had been Sir Alfred's mistress for some considerable time, and wept fetchingly into a lace handkerchief for several minutes before denying that she would ever harm a hair on the head of her dearest Alfred.
Believes Lady Cynthia killed Sir Alfred in order to get his money. There was a secret pre-nuptial agreement which would deny Lady Cynthia access to Sir Alfred's fortune if they were divorced.
Also, Maurice Bindweed entered the Library a few minutes before the shot was fired.
Maurice Bindweed
Only went into the Library to see whether Sir Alfred had yet finished with his paperknife, an object of some sentimental value to Mr Bindweed. But when he entered, Sir Alfred threw the inkpot at him and he left at once. Sir Alfred was obviously in a bad temper.
Dear me. Sordid revelations. All sorts of financial irregularities, and some rather suspicious little secrets. Everyone seems very keen to point an accusatory finger at someone else.
Doesn't look as though Sir Alfred had surrounded himself with friends for his last night alive, does it?
