Twin Reports

[pensnest]

I announced my intention of trying the cake-mix+Fanta approach to making a chocolate orange cake, and can now report on this.

Well, it works. I purchased a Betty Crocker Cake Mix (not, as it happens, the Devil's Food Cake mix I should have bought, but a chocolate cake anyway). I divided the mix in half. To one half, I added the grated zest and juice of an orange (instead of most of the water), eggs, and a smidgin of oil (to make the liquid quantity up to what it should have been). To the other half I added a few drops of orange oil, and a mini tin of Fanta (150ml).

I made individual cupcakes from the orange juice mix, and a loaf cake from the Fanta mix.

Both were successful! Both tasted decently of orange (the orange juice cake more so). The Fanta Loaf Cake was a little darker, quite moist, and of a 'bigger' texture; the orange juice cupcakes were quite fine grained and paler. Possibly most of that was due not to the mixture but to the difference between a loaf cake and a fairy cake, or the amount of oven time they received (possibly the loaf could have done with a couple of minutes longer).

However, if you want to make chocolate orange cake the easy way, I am happy to report that using Fanta instead of the oil+water+eggs specified in the recipe works perfectly well. It is certainly very simple!

*



These arrived the day before yesterday—slightly to my surprise, as the website is so very full of assurances that you will receive your Ubra REAL SOON NOW (including two texts, delivered to my landline) that I was at least half-expecting it never to arrive.

I'm a 38D or a 40C, depending, and I ordered the D-rated boob rabbits. I think it's quite possible the C-cup size would have been fine, maybe even better.

First impressions: They are *incredibly* sticky! And come with a covering of crinkly plastic—cellophane, maybe?—which is difficult to remove simply because there's nowhere to hold the boob rabbits without getting stuck. One manages, eventually. In fairness, there are sticky-free spots, notably for the nipple, and I was probably less than competent!

Putting them on was easy enough—although I have to say, I would have thought a set of instructions in the care and use of this Ubra would be an obvious thing to include in the package. Nope. I may go back to the website and see what it says… I was, I thought, suitably perky when they were freshly attached, and they were perfectly comfortable.

Yesterday morning's exercise was the resistance bands set, which starts off with dancing/warm-up exercises to three songs (in this instance, Love is in the Air/YMCA/Jukebox Jive). After which I was reasonably sweaty and the boob rabbit ears were failing to adhere.

The band exercises don't do much in the way of cardio, so I got through my session with just the minor annoyance of having to try re-sticking the ears to my sweaty chest now and again, which didn't work.

Shower, and afterwards, as well as my customary underboob application of talc, I put a little over the top as well.

The boob rabbits stayed on my chest for the rest of the day. However, every time I leaned over—and I don't know about you, but my day-to-day involves things like putting on slippers, picking thyme, getting the chopping board out of the bottom drawer, picking up dropped stuff, and petting cats—the rabbit ears came off. My Beast assures me that when I stand upright they are in 'shear' and therefore strong, whereas bending over puts them into 'tension' and therefore they are weak. Whatever. Happily, I can assure brandywine that there is no intrusive and embarrassing noise involved! Nothing visible, indeed, though the fact that neither boob visibly dropped was… well, probably because they weren't that well hoisted in the first place. I have so far refrained from aiming for Elizabeth Bennet under-the-chin levels of display, but perhaps I should try for extra, hmm, prominence next time.

Yesterday's impressions: they are perfectly comfortable, although peeling them off is a little weird. But when I put them on, I had boobs that were not drooping onto my chest, and later, a saggy chest-crease. To be fair, it isn't hard to readjust, but (observes chest) the left one at least managed to slither back downward again. Hmph. Possibly if there were a halter-style component that led to the rabbits being attached to more than just my chest, it would all be more effective.

I put them on again today, with greater success, probably because I did not wear them for exercise. They have stayed on my chest without peeling off at all (even when I bent over for bits of lunch prep), and are perfectly comfortable. I won't say, more comfortable than a bra, because I have managed to achieve bra nirvana and my current bras are not at all unpleasant to wear. However, I cannot confirm that the boob rabbits maintain a day-long level of perkiness, as I'm pretty sure the underboob crease now is only a slight improvement on what would have happened had I simply foregone any kind of boob support.

My verdict? Well… if you want to wear something backless and don't want your nipples to show, or don't want the line of the bra to mar the perfection of your garment, these are probably a decent solution—though I would be cautious about dancing in them. I do suspect that the less you need support, the more effective these will be! Mine are surprisingly big, and I had to change my top because the ears showed up in the not-particularly low neckline of yesterday's top. As I said above, I might have been better off with the C-size. They have been fine today, but I don't think they're an entirely adequate form of breast support. Overall, however, rather better than I really expected. I expect I'll wear them again, and see whether I can figure out the perfect angle for the ears.

Not sure that I'd actually recommend them to anyone with a D+ cup size, however.

Comments

[watervole]

I shall remain happily content with my almost non-existent boobs and my happy life without need for bras of any kind.

[dine]

chocolate & orange are so good together! glad your experiment worked out - maybe I can give it a shot some (cooler) day

[sylvaine]

Thank you for reporting back on both these experiments! :D

[yarnofariadne]

Thank you for the Fanta cake report! I'll have to try that :D

[oldtoadwoman]

I'm delighted to learn the Fanta cake worked.

I'll be avoiding the boob rabbits. I need a secure bra and even if the boob rabbits stayed in place, I think I'd be stressed out all day worried that they were about to slide. (Also... I once had this nightmare where my skin turned into silly putty and my boobs just stretched down to the floor. And... the older I get, the less funny that is.)

EDIT: Oh, and I meant to ask, what brand of bras do you have that you are so happy with?

[frausorge]

The cakes sound delish! Though I still cannot wrap my brain around the chemistry of replacing eggs with something non-egg-y. But chocolate + orange is indeed a convincingly winning combination.

The rabbits, otoh, don't sound particularly convincing, except for maybe walking the red carpet and sitting through an awards show. Thank you for the amusing report, though!

[brandywine28]

Ahahaha!

OK, well, the embarrassing noise was by far my biggest fear about the whole enterprise, so even if it wasn't a perfect experience, you have successfully allayed my worries. :)

Woohoo! Cake success! I've heard of cakes flavored with Kool Aid mix, so I knew it was possible in theory, but -- you pulled it off! NOT in theory! Awesome.

[pensnest]

That must make life a lot simpler! I am frequently grateful that I don't have huge boobs. They must be such a nuisance.

[pensnest]

It's probably worth using the Devils Food Cake mix, which I assume is richer than the regular Chocolate Cake one.

[pensnest]

An essential part of the fun. ;-)

[pensnest]

Remarkably painless cake, I call it!

[pensnest]

I did wear the boob rabbits yesterday and they were fine-ish, but eh. Unless one has a pressing need for a strapless bra, I doubt they are really worthwhile.

I get my bras from Marks & Spencer. We have a very large branch here with a splendid underwear department, and I was lucky enough to find a style that's really comfy, so I bought two or three.

[pensnest]

I know! I mean, lemonade scones make more sense, as you use the bubbles as raising agent, but I'm sure there is plenty of raising agent in the cake mix. But, yay!

:-) Writing a report is part of the fun.

[pensnest]

A hideous velcro sound as it peels from the skin would be hard to explain, for sure. No, all is silent.

Kool Aid sounds... nastier than Fanta. I've used it to dye yarn, though!

[ephemera]

I thank you for your services to boob-science. I am going to go ahead and continue to assume that there's no universe where boob-rabbits would work for me, but I'm fascinated that they work even at all!

(I'm still confused by the chemistry of how fanta can replace the *egg* part of the mix, but I can believe chocolate and orange cake would be a tasty output!)

[sperrywink]

I have no idea what boob rabbits are, but your descriptions are hilarious!

[oldtoadwoman]

Unless one has a pressing need for a strapless bra, I doubt they are really worthwhile.

I tend to suspect that things like this are made for special occasions where you just need to get through an event in your backless outfit for a few hours.

[pensnest]

I think you're right. Once upon a time I owned something not dissimilar, crescent-shaped things that would support the boobs from below. I think I'm the sort of person who will try something because it is novel. The rabbits are better, but still.

[pensnest]

I suspect the boob rabbits work best on people who don't actually need support...

It's quite surprising, and hard to imagine why someone experimented with the Fanta substitution to discover that it works (they actually cooked it in a Slow-cooker, too, but I just bunged mine in the oven).

[pensnest]

Boob rabbits. I can think of no better name for them!

[oldtoadwoman]

I'm a sucker for novelty if it's cheap. I cannot walk past a new flavor of Oreos without trying them even though they are rarely any better (and sometimes worse) than original flavor.

The sad thing is when I find a novelty flavor of something I love and they stop making them (coffee-flavored Twix and cheeseburger-flavored Doritos come to mind).

But I am a late-adapter when it comes to pricey tech. I'm always several years behind on gadgets. (I let the world be my beta testers and then I'll eventually upgrade to the thing they agreed sucked the least.)

Bras are this middle ground where they aren't cheap, yet not enough people are writing bra reviews to let other people tell me what to buy, and everyone's body is different so reviews might not be relevant.

Years ago I went to one of those pricey bra boutiques where they have every size imaginable and help custom fit you. The lady was not impressed with the bra I wore into the shop (Cacique with no underwire) and disparaged its lack of support. But... it's comfy. And the bras she sold me fit but would dig into my sides if I slouched even a little bit... and I'm a sloucher. That lady would be horrified to know that I later cut the underwire out of the bras she sold me.

[turps]

Excellent reporting on both!

The cake I'd be tempted to try, the boob rabbits not so much. And such an attempt would end in disaster.

[turlough]

Fascinating reports! Though now I will forever wonder what it is in Fanta that makes it work as a substitute for eggs :-) And the boob rabbits do indeed sounds like they're mostly supposed to be used for special occasions.

[rikes]

Still do not understand how Fanta cake works, but good to know I guess. Though I'm quite unlikely to ever have Fanta in the house...

The boob rabbits sound interesting! I wasn't really expecting them to work for excercising - but good thing you tried that as well. I hate that they don't have any kind of sizing guide available though!