(no subject)

[pensnest]

A while back I purchased a porn dvd. This proved to be a mistake. (We watched it, hopefully, in bed—and my husband fell asleep. Which was neither surprising nor, indeed, at the time particularly disappointing.)

But for some reason my mind has wandered back to a particular scene: there was a pneumatic young woman in a... booth? Not a toilet cubicle, as there was no such practical facility to be seen, but a trammelled space at any rate. And through a hole in the wall came a large, erect penis.

Well.

Faced with such an intrusion, what would you do, dear friendslist?

[Poll #1441776]

I'm inclined to think that the first answer is the male fantasy, the last is the female fantasy, and the middle one the likely truth. I would be fascinated to find out whether you agree.

Comments

[suzilem.livejournal.com]

I'd invite Sailor Jim over for tea.

[pensnest]

Ahaha! Is this the sort of thing Sailor Jim would do? Surely not! Although thinking about it, I suppose some incredibly convoluted story could end up this way... Must dig out my copy of NTTS.

[sailorjim.livejournal.com]

Well ... actually ...

I was, as nature decreed, a rather young and stupid sailor before I became the international man of oddity you know and pray for now ... so, yeah, I did something like that once.

It was a public bathhouse close to Chinatown and the poorly lettered sign over the hole said something to the effect that all one had to do was insert the item needing the attention of a "wife."

So, after doing my level best to think it though (which, since my poor head was befuddled with drink and smoke, was a long shot at best), I whipped Squeeker out and stuck him in the hole. It was a tight fit, but a warm hand gripped him gently ... and then I almost passed out from the pain of someone sewing a button onto its tip!

The corpsman didn't stop laughing for days ...

[pensnest]

*giggles helplessly* Perhaps a shoe would have been preferable!

[sailorjim.livejournal.com]

Given the circumstance involved ... no cream, please.