Psst: hey there, you wanna play detective?
Jan. 8th, 2006 10:50 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
pensnestI have no idea whether this is going to be of interest or not, but if I don't try it, I'll never know.
D'you fancy a spot of Detective Work?
A long while back, I wrote a wondrously convoluted Murder Mystery. I'd forgotten about it, but came across one of the props a few days ago, and thought I might adapt it to LJ.
So...
You are invited to help solve a tangled Mystery, to employ your Wit and Cunning to discover the identity of a Killer, though a Web of Intrigue and Deception will hamper your progress. The Red Herrings are so fresh they will answer back as you attempt to solve this Murder Most Foul.
And don't take any of it too seriously! There's plenty of crack to go round.
The Place: the London home of Sir Alfred and Lady Cynthia Groat
The Time: the evening of 30th September, 2005
The Occasion: a celebration of the 25th anniversary of the founding of Sir Alfred's company, Megalomania, Inc.
The Characters:
Sir Alfred Groat, the Chairman of Megalomania, Inc, and the host this evening, Sir Alfred is the hugely successful tycoon who founded the company and built it into the thriving concern that it is today.
Lady Cynthia Cholmondleigh-Barbour-Groat, his wife.
The Honourable Horatio Goode, nephew to Lady Cynthia.
Magnolia Luscious, proprietress of exclusive Mayfair chocolaterie Un Bras et Une Jambe, bonbon supplier to the fashionable and affluent.
Sid Sneer - the rising young star at Megalomania, Inc
Irma Hyphon-Smart the PR woman for Megalomania, Inc.
Maurice Bindweed the humble accountant who has been Sir Alfred’s devoted right-hand man for almost twenty-five years.
Julio 'Papa' Razzo - employed by the Daily Sleaze
Evidence: Item Number One
Tape no. 1
Transcript of a tape recording made by Julio 'Papa' Razzo, an employee of the Daily Sleaze. Speaker is the second footman in the home of Sir Alfred and Lady Cynthia Groat, who was evidently susceptible to bribery.
Oh, Sir Alfred? The Chairman? He likes his pint, Sir Alfred. Always says the toffs can keep their poncy shorts and their fancy cocktails, a pint of best is good enough for him. Never seen him drink anything else. But, I happen to know we keep the bar in his Library well stocked with gin. I'm betting he likes a G&T, on the quiet. But it doesn't fit the image, does it, the rough diamond from 'oop North' who founded Megalomania, Inc, and built it up from nothing into what it is today.
His wife, Lady Cynthia, now, there's a real lady. Always beautifully dressed, goes to all the fashion shows, they keep a seat for her, you know. And then there's her charity work. Helping women what have, you know, come down on their luck. Wonderful lady, she is.
And that's her nephew with her, the Honourable Horatio Goode. Lovely manners. Very generous, always tips the staff. Much appreciated, especially in this house, I tell you! He didn't bring a lady with him tonight, but he has lots of decorative girlfriends, he's always in the papers with a pretty girl on his arm. We don't see him in here often, he likes to go to the Drones Club, very exclusive, they don't let just anybody in, you know, but Mr Goode isn't just an ordinary member, they actually named a Cloakroom Peg after him. Quite an honour, they do say. Lady Cynthia was invited to the ceremony, last November it was, November 23rd. They don't let the ladies in there except for special occasions. Very exclusive club, the Drones.
Actually I did happen to overhear what he was telling that nice Ms Luscious, yes. Apparently Sir Alfred refused to sponsor the Drones Club Charity Tiddlywinks Tournament. You'd think, with Mr Goode being his wife's nephew...
Oh, Ms Luscious? Yes. Magnolia Luscious, her name is, not quite in Mr Goode's class, more trade, although very exclusive trade, she runs that fancy chocolate shop in Mayfair. Come to think of it, she was agreeing with Horatio that Sir Alfred is a bit of a tightfist, seems he wanted a discount on her exclusive chocolates, but then, Sir Alfred don't like to spend money on anything if he don't think it's worth it, and won't never pay full price if he don't have to. I mean, my wages are a disgrace! I suppose that's how he got to be so rich. He's never really liked that Irma Hyphon-Smart, always says PR is a silly excuse for a job. But you've got to have PR these days, haven't you? Speaking of PR, Ms Luscious was doing a bit of self-promotion, handing out her business cards to all and sundry - although, come to think of it, she kept well clear of Lady Cynthia, can't think why, Lady Cynthia's got all the right contacts. Cream of society, she is, the Earl of Masham was her father, you know. Not that she eats chocolates herself, I shouldn't think, with her figure. Wouldn't fit into the lovely designer dresses, would she?
I suppose Lady Cynthia's the one who persuaded Sir Alfred to hire Irma Hyphon-Smart. She's another upper-class type. We don't see her here much, I think she spends her time with the media types, mostly, and her foreign friends, from what I hear. Of course, she's got to socialise, she's the PR exec. That's her, talking to Sid Sneer, over by the window.
Sid Sneer, the rising star at Megalomania, Inc. Don't really belong in a top-class establishment like this, of course. You know the type, rags to riches, and all that. Apparently he walked barefoot all the way from his native hovel up in darkest Yorkshire right down here to Croydon. Got himself a job as a paper-clip filer in Dosh & Stashers - one of Mega, Inc's subsidiaries, that was - although there are some that say he actually started out as a boot-licker in the Junior Executive Washroom. I couldn't say, meself. He's obviously headed for the top, but not worried about who he steps on. Five minutes ago he was doing his best to be offensive to Mr Goode, talking about upper-class playboys who never have to work for anything. But he gets on all right with that Irma Hyphon-Smart, she doesn't seem to mind the working-class-boy made good nonsense.
Oh, excuse me while I serve this gentleman.
Yes. That was Maurice Bindweed. The company accountant. Huh. I suppose penny-pinching comes natural to someone like him. He's another one as never tips the staff, though we always have to make a special effort for him because he's got such a sweet tooth. Lady Cynthia would never touch cream sherry and chocolate biscuits, but she keeps them in the house because she's the perfect hostess. Mr Bindweed was doing his best to bore poor Lady Cynthia to death, telling her all about his railway timetable collection. Acourse, Sir Alfred bullies him terribly, but you can see why, can't you? Wimpy little stick of a man.
Which paper did you say you was from? Oh, the Daily Sleaze! Didn't they have something about Mega, Inc only this morning?
Evidence: Item No 2
A cutting from the Daily Sleaze, dated 30th September 2005
Evidence: Item number three
Brief schedule of events, pieced together from interviews with the above-listed suspects and members of the Groats' staff
At 1940 hrs, Sir Alfred Groat clapped his hands loudly and called for silence. He brandished a copy of that morning's Daily Sleaze, and announced that there was no truth whatsoever in the item concerning Megalomania, Inc. He spoke abusively to Mr Razzo, asking him who passed on the information to the newspaper. Mr Razzo stated that he had received a telephone call late at night on 22nd September, but refused to name his 'impeccable source'.
Sir Alfred announced that he knew What Had Been Going On, and intended to reveal the truth before the evening was over. This appears to have caused consternation among all except the Daily Sleaze representative, who allegedly got out his notebook. At that point Sir Alfred's mobile phone rang, and he retired to the privacy of the Library.
Other people present left the room in the following order: Lady Cynthia; Ms Irma Hyphon-Smart; Mr Sid Sneer; Mr Maurice Bindweed; the Hon Horatio Goode; Ms Magnolia Luscious and Mr Julio 'Papa' Razzo.
Several minutes later, A Shot Was Heard.
A Shot! Fancy that! Is there now a Body in the Library, or has Something Terrible happened elsewhere? If a body there is, whose is it? And why is someone dead? Most importantly, who dunnit?
I have no wish to be a complete bore, therefore, further evidence will be submitted for your consideration tomorrow (and thereafter) if you wish to see more. Please comment if you're interested! And do, if you care to, speculate on the above.
D'you fancy a spot of Detective Work?
A long while back, I wrote a wondrously convoluted Murder Mystery. I'd forgotten about it, but came across one of the props a few days ago, and thought I might adapt it to LJ.
So...
You are invited to help solve a tangled Mystery, to employ your Wit and Cunning to discover the identity of a Killer, though a Web of Intrigue and Deception will hamper your progress. The Red Herrings are so fresh they will answer back as you attempt to solve this Murder Most Foul.
And don't take any of it too seriously! There's plenty of crack to go round.
The Place: the London home of Sir Alfred and Lady Cynthia Groat
The Time: the evening of 30th September, 2005
The Occasion: a celebration of the 25th anniversary of the founding of Sir Alfred's company, Megalomania, Inc.
The Characters:
Sir Alfred Groat, the Chairman of Megalomania, Inc, and the host this evening, Sir Alfred is the hugely successful tycoon who founded the company and built it into the thriving concern that it is today.
Lady Cynthia Cholmondleigh-Barbour-Groat, his wife.
The Honourable Horatio Goode, nephew to Lady Cynthia.
Magnolia Luscious, proprietress of exclusive Mayfair chocolaterie Un Bras et Une Jambe, bonbon supplier to the fashionable and affluent.
Sid Sneer - the rising young star at Megalomania, Inc
Irma Hyphon-Smart the PR woman for Megalomania, Inc.
Maurice Bindweed the humble accountant who has been Sir Alfred’s devoted right-hand man for almost twenty-five years.
Julio 'Papa' Razzo - employed by the Daily Sleaze
Evidence: Item Number One
Tape no. 1
Transcript of a tape recording made by Julio 'Papa' Razzo, an employee of the Daily Sleaze. Speaker is the second footman in the home of Sir Alfred and Lady Cynthia Groat, who was evidently susceptible to bribery.
Oh, Sir Alfred? The Chairman? He likes his pint, Sir Alfred. Always says the toffs can keep their poncy shorts and their fancy cocktails, a pint of best is good enough for him. Never seen him drink anything else. But, I happen to know we keep the bar in his Library well stocked with gin. I'm betting he likes a G&T, on the quiet. But it doesn't fit the image, does it, the rough diamond from 'oop North' who founded Megalomania, Inc, and built it up from nothing into what it is today.
His wife, Lady Cynthia, now, there's a real lady. Always beautifully dressed, goes to all the fashion shows, they keep a seat for her, you know. And then there's her charity work. Helping women what have, you know, come down on their luck. Wonderful lady, she is.
And that's her nephew with her, the Honourable Horatio Goode. Lovely manners. Very generous, always tips the staff. Much appreciated, especially in this house, I tell you! He didn't bring a lady with him tonight, but he has lots of decorative girlfriends, he's always in the papers with a pretty girl on his arm. We don't see him in here often, he likes to go to the Drones Club, very exclusive, they don't let just anybody in, you know, but Mr Goode isn't just an ordinary member, they actually named a Cloakroom Peg after him. Quite an honour, they do say. Lady Cynthia was invited to the ceremony, last November it was, November 23rd. They don't let the ladies in there except for special occasions. Very exclusive club, the Drones.
Actually I did happen to overhear what he was telling that nice Ms Luscious, yes. Apparently Sir Alfred refused to sponsor the Drones Club Charity Tiddlywinks Tournament. You'd think, with Mr Goode being his wife's nephew...
Oh, Ms Luscious? Yes. Magnolia Luscious, her name is, not quite in Mr Goode's class, more trade, although very exclusive trade, she runs that fancy chocolate shop in Mayfair. Come to think of it, she was agreeing with Horatio that Sir Alfred is a bit of a tightfist, seems he wanted a discount on her exclusive chocolates, but then, Sir Alfred don't like to spend money on anything if he don't think it's worth it, and won't never pay full price if he don't have to. I mean, my wages are a disgrace! I suppose that's how he got to be so rich. He's never really liked that Irma Hyphon-Smart, always says PR is a silly excuse for a job. But you've got to have PR these days, haven't you? Speaking of PR, Ms Luscious was doing a bit of self-promotion, handing out her business cards to all and sundry - although, come to think of it, she kept well clear of Lady Cynthia, can't think why, Lady Cynthia's got all the right contacts. Cream of society, she is, the Earl of Masham was her father, you know. Not that she eats chocolates herself, I shouldn't think, with her figure. Wouldn't fit into the lovely designer dresses, would she?
I suppose Lady Cynthia's the one who persuaded Sir Alfred to hire Irma Hyphon-Smart. She's another upper-class type. We don't see her here much, I think she spends her time with the media types, mostly, and her foreign friends, from what I hear. Of course, she's got to socialise, she's the PR exec. That's her, talking to Sid Sneer, over by the window.
Sid Sneer, the rising star at Megalomania, Inc. Don't really belong in a top-class establishment like this, of course. You know the type, rags to riches, and all that. Apparently he walked barefoot all the way from his native hovel up in darkest Yorkshire right down here to Croydon. Got himself a job as a paper-clip filer in Dosh & Stashers - one of Mega, Inc's subsidiaries, that was - although there are some that say he actually started out as a boot-licker in the Junior Executive Washroom. I couldn't say, meself. He's obviously headed for the top, but not worried about who he steps on. Five minutes ago he was doing his best to be offensive to Mr Goode, talking about upper-class playboys who never have to work for anything. But he gets on all right with that Irma Hyphon-Smart, she doesn't seem to mind the working-class-boy made good nonsense.
Oh, excuse me while I serve this gentleman.
Yes. That was Maurice Bindweed. The company accountant. Huh. I suppose penny-pinching comes natural to someone like him. He's another one as never tips the staff, though we always have to make a special effort for him because he's got such a sweet tooth. Lady Cynthia would never touch cream sherry and chocolate biscuits, but she keeps them in the house because she's the perfect hostess. Mr Bindweed was doing his best to bore poor Lady Cynthia to death, telling her all about his railway timetable collection. Acourse, Sir Alfred bullies him terribly, but you can see why, can't you? Wimpy little stick of a man.
Which paper did you say you was from? Oh, the Daily Sleaze! Didn't they have something about Mega, Inc only this morning?
Evidence: Item No 2
A cutting from the Daily Sleaze, dated 30th September 2005
Evidence: Item number three
Brief schedule of events, pieced together from interviews with the above-listed suspects and members of the Groats' staff
At 1940 hrs, Sir Alfred Groat clapped his hands loudly and called for silence. He brandished a copy of that morning's Daily Sleaze, and announced that there was no truth whatsoever in the item concerning Megalomania, Inc. He spoke abusively to Mr Razzo, asking him who passed on the information to the newspaper. Mr Razzo stated that he had received a telephone call late at night on 22nd September, but refused to name his 'impeccable source'.
Sir Alfred announced that he knew What Had Been Going On, and intended to reveal the truth before the evening was over. This appears to have caused consternation among all except the Daily Sleaze representative, who allegedly got out his notebook. At that point Sir Alfred's mobile phone rang, and he retired to the privacy of the Library.
Other people present left the room in the following order: Lady Cynthia; Ms Irma Hyphon-Smart; Mr Sid Sneer; Mr Maurice Bindweed; the Hon Horatio Goode; Ms Magnolia Luscious and Mr Julio 'Papa' Razzo.
Several minutes later, A Shot Was Heard.
A Shot! Fancy that! Is there now a Body in the Library, or has Something Terrible happened elsewhere? If a body there is, whose is it? And why is someone dead? Most importantly, who dunnit?
I have no wish to be a complete bore, therefore, further evidence will be submitted for your consideration tomorrow (and thereafter) if you wish to see more. Please comment if you're interested! And do, if you care to, speculate on the above.
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Date: 2006-01-12 02:33 am (UTC)