things can only get better
Jul. 4th, 2024 11:34 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
pensnestI've never sat up all night to watch the UK election results come in - though I did watch Barack Obama get elected, which was very satisfactory. I don't know if I'll make it through the night tonight, as I'm actually quite weary, but I shall see.
So far, just seen two results come in. Both Labour wins, yay, but both with a horrifying number of votes for Reform. I mean, sure, they seem to have been taken from the Tories' share, which is good, but oh, dear god, so many people voting Reform. Reform, which means, let's go back to the eighteenth century. Fuck that.
Also, I continue to be absolutely horrified by the number of people in this country who don't bother to show up to vote.
*
Oh my, what a lot of cutesy graphics. Someone is jumping around with a display of tall hexagon-stalks. I'm not sure it was as clear as whoever designed it hoped it would be.
Oh, joy. The Victorian Spider on my television. Boo. I hope you lose hard. Bastard.
*
There is a Reform candidate on the TV now, and I want to hit him with a spade. I can see that Reform have done well to demolish the Conservative vote, but this is awful. First three constituencies announced, all Lab, Reform second in all of them.
*
Ah, well done, Swindon. Classy new MP, classy defeated Tory, and an actual Lab gain.
*
Ah, joy. First Reform Party MP of the night. Oh, and I see Clive has kept Norwich South - Labour, and a nice chap.
Okay, what is an SPKR when it's at home? Ah, apparently it's a constituency that has changed enough to be unrecognisable. I do think the BBC pundits might have explained that.
OMG, Neil Kinnock? Being delightfully forthright on the subject of George Galloway - 'repellent', 'repulsive' etc. Tell it like you see it, Neil! That's entertainment.
*
Hello Ed Davey, congratulations. I didn't see you paddleboarding or bungee jumping, but at least I knew who was the leader of the Liberal Democrats, and now I even know what you look like.
*
There was a candidate called The Incredible Flying Brick in Keir Starmer's constituency. Starmer won easily, of course. Quite nice to see the man smile. Even though his majority is down quite a bit. Pro-Gaza candidate in the running, did quite well.
I suppose the noxious Farage creature is probably going to be elected this time - but I appreciate the way that the pundits mention every time his name is spoken that he has tried and failed to be elected to Parliament seven times already.
My goodness, the red notices appearing at the bottom of the screen are relentless!
Oh wait, Lib Dems have captured Cheltenham. Good for you. Oh, and Carshalton. I used to live there. Good for the LibDems, ooh, three orange notices in a row! I could do with seeing a good old-fashioned list at this point, or that blobby version of this small island with little coloured spots on it. Now the South of the country is counting its votes there's quite a bit of orange.
Waiting to see if Conservative chairman has kept his seat. And Farage has won one? I kinda need to go to the loo but I'd like to see what happens. Not so much as I'd like to see the Victorian Spider kicked out, though.
Ooh, Grant Shapps is booted by Labour. Good.
Good gracious a Conservative gain in Leicester East? What is this madness?
Ooh, Sutton and Cheam went LibDem. I used to live in that constituency. Well done, Sutton and Cheam.
Oh lord, another fancy yet unhelpful graphic with tall hexagonal stacks. Oo-er. Turned from blue to a mix of yellow, red, pink and an occasional light blue. Very nice dears.
*
Results coming in thick and fast. Lib Dems get Stratford-on-Avon, which is nice.
Jeremy Corbyn seems to have smashed it as an Independent in Islington. Howls of joy from the assembled masses! Gracious, the turnout in that constituency must have been a goodly percentage, since Labour made a good showing too - oh, only 68%. Still. Well done, chaps. Mandelson being snotty about Corbyn too. Always fun to hear the dissing.
Oh, Clacton. Oh, shit. Farage it is. Batrachian smile, inevitably. Dear me, a UKIP candidate, seriously? No, don't make me listen to that creature giving a speech. Pooh. "Centre right," my arse.
*
Great Yarmouth voted in a Reform candidate. Bleah. Peasants.
An Independent whom I've never heard of has taken a seat from a Labour Shadow Cabinet member. Interesting. Speculation on the Con gain in Leicester East is that it's due to the Asian vote. Oh for goodness' sake, why would Muslims vote Reform? Sigh. But Labour are heavily down in constituencies with lots of Muslim voters, probably Because Gaza, which is fair.
Definitely clear that the Tories are losing, rather than Labour winning, exactly, because a disgusting number of my fellow-countrypersons are voting Reform. Well, it spoils the Tory vote, but it's not a good look.
Greens win in Bristol, yay! And Labour win in Hemel Hempstead, yay! Suella Braverman on screen giving a victory speech, boo. Ah, now she's making a bid for the leadership. Nice.
Norwich appears to be rather slow at counting, sigh.
Hmm, an Isle of Wight constituency goes red. Presumably a Reform spoiler par excellence?
*
Norwich North YES! Labour gain. Phew.
Disconcertingly there appears to be a young redheaded lady on the screen who is looking at me here on the sofa in my pyjamas, and pointing.
Oh, Boston goes to Reform. Lovely. The Reform candidates all look alike, except for Farage who is more toad-like than the rest.
Ooh, Penny Mordaunt lost her seat. Appropriate level of slaughter amongst the Tory Cabinet, given the crap quality of said Cabinet. Though as Leader of the House I'm not sure if she's Cabinet or something else. But, heh. Mandelson seems more or less in favour of Penny Mordaunt, though.
What of Jeremy Hunt, pray?
There is apparently a constituency called Soton Itchen, which I find charming.
Geez, so much red. Here and there an oddity, but there is a relentless progress of Labour Hold, Labour Gain, and LibDem Gain.
*
Oh well, Sunak held his seat. So did Jeremy Hunt. Sunak had a Whole Bunch of ridiculous stunt candidates in his constituency. Sunak quite gracious, announced that Labour have won the election and he's called Starmer to concede. Fair enough, really.
Oh, Fuck yes, Rees Mogg loses his seat. Ahahaha! I can go to bed happy.
Stayed in front of telly long enough to see Keir Starmer's giving a speech, smiling, and coming across rather likeable and sensible. Yeah.
Interesting how the Labour victory came about - a *lot* of Reform spoilers, which is depressing. I do not want to see my country go that way. Perhaps the Tory party will wrench itself in twain and take Reform down with it? One can only hope. Lib Dems have done nicely, and it's good to see the Greens making at least one gain.
Anyway, Labour have 352 seats now, and I'm going to bed.
Morning edit: Aha! I failed to notice that Liz Truss lost her seat! Good on yer, Norfolk.
So far, just seen two results come in. Both Labour wins, yay, but both with a horrifying number of votes for Reform. I mean, sure, they seem to have been taken from the Tories' share, which is good, but oh, dear god, so many people voting Reform. Reform, which means, let's go back to the eighteenth century. Fuck that.
Also, I continue to be absolutely horrified by the number of people in this country who don't bother to show up to vote.
*
Oh my, what a lot of cutesy graphics. Someone is jumping around with a display of tall hexagon-stalks. I'm not sure it was as clear as whoever designed it hoped it would be.
Oh, joy. The Victorian Spider on my television. Boo. I hope you lose hard. Bastard.
*
There is a Reform candidate on the TV now, and I want to hit him with a spade. I can see that Reform have done well to demolish the Conservative vote, but this is awful. First three constituencies announced, all Lab, Reform second in all of them.
*
Ah, well done, Swindon. Classy new MP, classy defeated Tory, and an actual Lab gain.
*
Ah, joy. First Reform Party MP of the night. Oh, and I see Clive has kept Norwich South - Labour, and a nice chap.
Okay, what is an SPKR when it's at home? Ah, apparently it's a constituency that has changed enough to be unrecognisable. I do think the BBC pundits might have explained that.
OMG, Neil Kinnock? Being delightfully forthright on the subject of George Galloway - 'repellent', 'repulsive' etc. Tell it like you see it, Neil! That's entertainment.
*
Hello Ed Davey, congratulations. I didn't see you paddleboarding or bungee jumping, but at least I knew who was the leader of the Liberal Democrats, and now I even know what you look like.
*
There was a candidate called The Incredible Flying Brick in Keir Starmer's constituency. Starmer won easily, of course. Quite nice to see the man smile. Even though his majority is down quite a bit. Pro-Gaza candidate in the running, did quite well.
I suppose the noxious Farage creature is probably going to be elected this time - but I appreciate the way that the pundits mention every time his name is spoken that he has tried and failed to be elected to Parliament seven times already.
My goodness, the red notices appearing at the bottom of the screen are relentless!
Oh wait, Lib Dems have captured Cheltenham. Good for you. Oh, and Carshalton. I used to live there. Good for the LibDems, ooh, three orange notices in a row! I could do with seeing a good old-fashioned list at this point, or that blobby version of this small island with little coloured spots on it. Now the South of the country is counting its votes there's quite a bit of orange.
Waiting to see if Conservative chairman has kept his seat. And Farage has won one? I kinda need to go to the loo but I'd like to see what happens. Not so much as I'd like to see the Victorian Spider kicked out, though.
Ooh, Grant Shapps is booted by Labour. Good.
Good gracious a Conservative gain in Leicester East? What is this madness?
Ooh, Sutton and Cheam went LibDem. I used to live in that constituency. Well done, Sutton and Cheam.
Oh lord, another fancy yet unhelpful graphic with tall hexagonal stacks. Oo-er. Turned from blue to a mix of yellow, red, pink and an occasional light blue. Very nice dears.
*
Results coming in thick and fast. Lib Dems get Stratford-on-Avon, which is nice.
Jeremy Corbyn seems to have smashed it as an Independent in Islington. Howls of joy from the assembled masses! Gracious, the turnout in that constituency must have been a goodly percentage, since Labour made a good showing too - oh, only 68%. Still. Well done, chaps. Mandelson being snotty about Corbyn too. Always fun to hear the dissing.
Oh, Clacton. Oh, shit. Farage it is. Batrachian smile, inevitably. Dear me, a UKIP candidate, seriously? No, don't make me listen to that creature giving a speech. Pooh. "Centre right," my arse.
*
Great Yarmouth voted in a Reform candidate. Bleah. Peasants.
An Independent whom I've never heard of has taken a seat from a Labour Shadow Cabinet member. Interesting. Speculation on the Con gain in Leicester East is that it's due to the Asian vote. Oh for goodness' sake, why would Muslims vote Reform? Sigh. But Labour are heavily down in constituencies with lots of Muslim voters, probably Because Gaza, which is fair.
Definitely clear that the Tories are losing, rather than Labour winning, exactly, because a disgusting number of my fellow-countrypersons are voting Reform. Well, it spoils the Tory vote, but it's not a good look.
Greens win in Bristol, yay! And Labour win in Hemel Hempstead, yay! Suella Braverman on screen giving a victory speech, boo. Ah, now she's making a bid for the leadership. Nice.
Norwich appears to be rather slow at counting, sigh.
Hmm, an Isle of Wight constituency goes red. Presumably a Reform spoiler par excellence?
*
Norwich North YES! Labour gain. Phew.
Disconcertingly there appears to be a young redheaded lady on the screen who is looking at me here on the sofa in my pyjamas, and pointing.
Oh, Boston goes to Reform. Lovely. The Reform candidates all look alike, except for Farage who is more toad-like than the rest.
Ooh, Penny Mordaunt lost her seat. Appropriate level of slaughter amongst the Tory Cabinet, given the crap quality of said Cabinet. Though as Leader of the House I'm not sure if she's Cabinet or something else. But, heh. Mandelson seems more or less in favour of Penny Mordaunt, though.
What of Jeremy Hunt, pray?
There is apparently a constituency called Soton Itchen, which I find charming.
Geez, so much red. Here and there an oddity, but there is a relentless progress of Labour Hold, Labour Gain, and LibDem Gain.
*
Oh well, Sunak held his seat. So did Jeremy Hunt. Sunak had a Whole Bunch of ridiculous stunt candidates in his constituency. Sunak quite gracious, announced that Labour have won the election and he's called Starmer to concede. Fair enough, really.
Oh, Fuck yes, Rees Mogg loses his seat. Ahahaha! I can go to bed happy.
Stayed in front of telly long enough to see Keir Starmer's giving a speech, smiling, and coming across rather likeable and sensible. Yeah.
Interesting how the Labour victory came about - a *lot* of Reform spoilers, which is depressing. I do not want to see my country go that way. Perhaps the Tory party will wrench itself in twain and take Reform down with it? One can only hope. Lib Dems have done nicely, and it's good to see the Greens making at least one gain.
Anyway, Labour have 352 seats now, and I'm going to bed.
Morning edit: Aha! I failed to notice that Liz Truss lost her seat! Good on yer, Norfolk.