pensnest: cartoon Mycroft, caption 'never mind your usual trivia' (Mycroft never mind trivia)
[personal profile] pensnest
In case anyone was wondering what occasioned the bellow of inarticulate wrath and despair that was my previous entry, it was the realisation that I was going to be running a rehearsal minus five (of nine) principals, a musical director and, as it turned out, a pianist. Yes, the show does open on the 20th.

To restore my composure, I meme. Sadly, though, it just depresses me to see how long it is since I managed to write anything creative that wasn't A Little List. But here are the first lines from my 21 most recent stories—popslash of Glambert or a crossover between the two, unless otherwise stated. (At least, I think they are - although I put things up by date on my website, there is some slack in that particular system.)


"It's great to be back on a bus," JC said. "Dude, what are you doing?" It's Cool, It's Hot, It's a Relationship, It's Not

It wasn't much of a dressing room, but at least there was a good-sized mirror over the cluttered table, and light enough to check out his makeup. Wanna Tell Me About It?

Our eyes meet, and he makes me gasp, so full of love and lust and everything I want him to be. The Oddly Glitchy Interface remix

"I'm—we're not doing anything." just because

Lance's christening gift was a pile of books considerably higher than the baby was long. Oh, the Places You'll Go

Chris awoke with his heart pounding in his chest like an twenty-one gun salute in overdrive. Cake

It took Nick a long time to figure it out. Wings would be cool

Once upon a time, there were five princes. Fairy Tale

Ho, bandmates all, arise! and quit your games. As You Like I Love You

"Tough cookies, Lance. Looks like you get to spend more time with your favorite Backstreet Boy." Different Harmonies

"You know, if those ever get on the internet, I'm cutting you off for a year." Picture Perfect

The bass thumped, and sound reverberated around the club. The Pussycat and the Porcupine

The dogs were enjoying themselves, happily chasing one another and the rubber ring they'd occasionally bring back to him to throw again. The First Step

"Happy day-after-your-birthday." Ribbons, Bows and Beads.

"So, um, Adam, I've been wondering." Lance slid down onto the couch and patted Adam's knee. Feast

Small clothes. Shirts for a week, with two spares, just in case. Neckcloths. Stockings. Riding dress, shooting clothes, morning dress. Evening clothes… Sparrowhawk and Beeswax

Sitting in the cramped seat of a cheap but direct flight from Vegas to Duluth, Adam fretted. Checking for Titanium

"So. Chris is having a Halloween party." The Adam Lambert Experience

"Is Chris having problems?" JC asked Lance as they wandered onto the stage for soundcheck. Hooked on the Sensation

The morning alarm sounded, and Adam groped blindly for it. Photoshoot

"Hey, baby."
Adam opened one eye. "Hey." Switch


Looks as though I have a tendency for shortish opening sentences, which mostly aren't that memorable, just utilitarian introductions to the story. I wonder if that would have been different with the first twenty-one stories I wrote. Probably not.

And here are my favourite ten opening lines from the omgeversomany stories I've written.

My favourite opening line I've ever written:

Anybody who thinks they have a hard life should try shovelling dragon shit for a living.
If You Want To Fly

My second favourite (and I have to use the whole paragraph, because yes):

Perez Hilton was dead. He had been shot between the eyes by a hired assassin. He had been slowly and carefully eviscerated like a laboratory rat. He had been sliced and diced in a meat factory, smashed by a thirty-ton truck, starved to death in a basement, drowned in a jacuzzi, and burned at the stake. He had been eaten by wolves. He was, one way or another, very, very dead. The Christmas Tree Conspiracy

This needs no explanation, I feel sure. This is one enticing opening paragraph!

Other contenders:

JC was holding up a pair of Y-fronts that were surely too big for AJ's skinny frame, and looking indignant. "What's with the baggy underpants, man?" Free Range

Woke up this morning and couldn’t find my vibrator anywhere. These Galaxy class starships really do keep themselves squeaky clean. Buzz (ST:TNG, Data/Ensign Sue)

"Aargh!" Chris shrieked, as the entire contents of the medicine cabinet showered down onto his hapless head. Shiny Teeth

This is the story of how I lost my favorite shoe. A Night at the Palace (I like this one for being perfectly concise. It's the set-up for a Cinderella story.)

There's an elephant on the bus, but Joey doesn't think Lance has noticed. Pink Elephants

Somebody shrieked in JC's dream, and woke him up, so he's not dancing with Michelle Pfeiffer in a werewolf club after all. Frosty (This one's just so weird, but it's a great start for an entirely inconsequential ficlet.)

They didn't all five get together very often these days, so it was at dinner one night in LA with Lance and Joey that JC announced he was in love with a swan. The Swan

Did not mean to make first entry into new diary journal a complaint, but Justin did not need to cut me off four—four—times in interview today. Reindeer Games (the Like a Lightbulb Remix)

Date: 2013-04-14 10:25 am (UTC)
aralias: (riker is a babe magnet (not really))
From: [personal profile] aralias
so many of these are brilliant, even out of context (and in most cases i have no idea what the context is at all). the elephant and the swan ones are brilliantly bizarre - and i liked the TNG one so much that i just read the story (which is hilarious, and also - plausible).

sorry so many people are being flaky about the mikado - does indeed so like a situation in need of wordless rage. hope all goes ok.

Date: 2013-04-14 10:36 am (UTC)
sperrywink: (Default)
From: [personal profile] sperrywink
That sucks about the other people involved in your play not showing up for rehearsal.

Great opening lines! I like it when they set the scene that way. The Perez Hilton is dead one is the best though. *g*

Date: 2013-04-14 09:16 pm (UTC)
wenchpixie: (stock books)
From: [personal profile] wenchpixie
Your rage appears to have been both utterly reasonable and remarkably restrained. I hope they buck up their ideas post haste.

Date: 2013-04-15 02:44 pm (UTC)
turps: (Default)
From: [personal profile] turps
The Perez paragraph really is enticing!

Sorry about all the hassle with rehearsals :(

Date: 2013-04-20 12:09 pm (UTC)
rikes: drawing of a fairy, with cherry blossoms (Default)
From: [personal profile] rikes
Good luck with the show tonight!!!

Date: 2013-04-16 11:23 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] brandywine28.livejournal.com
Your second favorite opening line(s) had me cackling so hard my face started to hurt. BRILLIANT.

I'm sorry rehearsals have been wrath-inducing. With any luck it'll all fall into place before opening night!

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