LaLa, lalala, lalalalala

[pensnest]

My sister informed me that, despite the warnings, she read one of my stories (probably 'Home Cooking' from 1st April, as sweet and innocent a popslash as ever I wrote). She found it "...interesting!!!" Heh. Fortunately, she is not among the, oh, half-dozen people in the world who will understand this one.


So, where—ah, there it was. Lance crossed to the bed to pick up his missing bag, and then paused. Right there, on the table beside the bed...

He was sure he didn't have one of those in his hotel room.

Lance sat on the edge of the bed, and looked at it. Pretty. Pretty light purple shiny... was that liquid? He ran a fingertip down the glassy length, and inside the lamp, as if in response, a slender scarlet tendril slid upward. Lance smiled. A glowing red bubble split off and rose serenely to the top, floated gently down again. More bubbles rose, bright and perfect. Fat liquid fingers stretched themselves upwards, flowing vivid and sinuous through their amethyst world.

Lance was fascinated. And envious. How come Chris had *this*, and all there was on his own bedside table was a common lampshade on a stick?

He was too entranced to notice when the door opened, but the "Hey!" made him jump and jerk his hand back.

"Don't touch that!" Chris commanded. "Why are you in my room?"

"It, I was just—my bag got put in here by mistake," Lance explained, flushing a little. "Lonnie lent me his key." Chris's hostile stare did not fade. "I'll, um... I'll go back to my room, then."

"Yeah, you should," said Chris, shortly.

"Okay," said Lance, standing up and retrieving his bag. As he made his hasty exit, he thought he heard Chris's voice, high and indignant, saying, "Were you flirting —" before the door closed behind him.

* * *

And now... He didn't care what people said about his shopping habit. So he actually *liked* reading through those catalogues of essential things you'd never known you couldn't do without, the ones Chris sneered at and threw straight in the trash. If Lance hadn't read every page, he'd never have seen...

And now, it was *here*. Lance's fingers almost trembled as he slit open the tape and unfolded the cardboard. Slid the inner box free, opened it, lifted off the thick protective white styrofoam.

Magnificent! The volcanic shape, the glitter drifting within the pale liquid, even the coiled line of flex. It was perfect. It was love at first sight.

He couldn't wait to turn it on.

Comments

[buddleia.livejournal.com]

So, your sister reads the porn and isn't traumatised and I read THIS and am hiding under my desk! Aii!

[pensnest]

*roars with laughter* Lava Lamps Rule!

Though possibly there should be a Warning on such stories.

[trumpeterofdoom.livejournal.com]

Not Lance too!!!

[pensnest]

Lance has a lava lamp. There is *evidence*.

[turps33.livejournal.com]

So much glee!

Yes, Lance does have a lamp, and they're going to be so happy together :D

Also, this line, made his hasty exit, he thought he heard Chris's voice, high and indignant, saying, "Were you flirting — had me laughing so much. Bad Lamp!

The first Lance/Lamp story. What a fine day *g*

[pensnest]

I knew *you* would have the good taste to appreciate the complexities of these relationships.

Koff.

[ravenbat.livejournal.com]

*gigglesnorts*

Oh my... words fail me.

*giggles*

[pensnest]

Let lavalamp joy be unconfined! ;->

[ephemera-pop.livejournal.com]

*giggles*

*giggles some more*

*has really bad ideas I shouldn't be having*

[pensnest]

has really bad ideas I shouldn't be having*

Oh, do share!

[glendaglamazon.livejournal.com]

Heh. Oh, Lance soooo has a Lamp. But, we can't make a smooshy name, because either way, it winds up "Lance" or "Lamp" :-O

[pensnest]

He does, he does! We *saw* it!

we can't make a smooshy name

"LaLa" Simple, but perfect.

[glendaglamazon.livejournal.com]

Ha! That's perfect! And it never occurred to me! It instantly brought to mind the Ashlee Simpson song (which, normally, I'd have to kill you for, but in this instance, it made me laugh and laugh and laugh)!

[pensnest]

I am, mercifully, unfamiliar with the Ashlee Simpson song. I just think Teletubbies.

[glendaglamazon.livejournal.com]

No, the words are really fitting (just try to put the Ashlee Simpson part out of your head). I shall share...

La La

You can dress me up diamonds
You can dress me up in dirt
You can throw me like a line-man
I like it better when it hurts

Oh, I have waited here for you
I have waited

You make me wanna la la
in the kitchen on the floor
I'll be a french maid
When I meet you at the door
I'm like an alley cat
Drink the milk up, I want more
You make me wanna
You make me wanna scream

You can meet me on an aero-plane
Or in the back of the bus
You can throw me like a boomerang
I'll come back and beat you up

Oh, I have waited here for you
Dont, keep me waiting

You make me wanna la la
in the kitchen on the floor
I'll be a french maid
When I meet you at the door
I'm like an alley cat
Drink the milk up, I want more
You make me wanna

You make me wanna la la
in the kitchen on the floor
I'll be a french maid
When I meet you at the door
I'm like an alley cat
Drink the milk up, I want more
You make me wanna
You make me wanna scream

I feel safe with you
I can be myself tonight
It's alright, with you
Cuz you hold, my secrets tight
You do, You do

You make me wanna la la, la la la, la la, la la la la la la la la la
You make me wana la la, la la la la

You make me wanna la la
in the kitchen on the floor
I'll be a french maid
When I meet you at the door
I'm like an alley cat
Drink the milk up, I want more
You make me wanna
You make me wanna la la
in the kitchen on the floor
I'll be a french maid
When I meet you at the door
I'm like an alley cat
Drink the milk up, I want more
You make me wanna
You make me wanna scream

You make me wanna la la, la la la, la la, la la la la la la la la la
(repeated over and over and over and over)

[pensnest]

Oh ma Lawd! Hee!

bun18 has just offered to alert me when the song plays on her Pandora. Hmm.

[raynedanser.livejournal.com]

Oh dear . . . .

*falls over laughing*

LaLa!!!

That's . . . priceless!!!!

*squeaks*

[pensnest]

The love of Lamp is a wonderful thing. ;-)

[raynedanser.livejournal.com]

No one can resist the mesmerizing gaze of Lamp.

[pensnest]

I certainly can't get through the lighting department in John Lewis without giggling, that's for sure!

[raynedanser.livejournal.com]

Any sort of Lamp sighting has me cracking up mysteriously. It's better to let them think I am only a teensy bit strange then (attempt to) explain and not only confirm it, but also help them understand how much they underestimated the strangeness. :-D

[pensnest]

That is *exactly* true. :-D

[clear-my-eyes.livejournal.com]

Lol! Just the thing to cheer me up and make me smile after a lousy day at work.

LaLa - love the name too. Inspired!

[pensnest]

What with this and the sonnet, I really think I may be losing it... But then, I probably won't miss it. Glad I could cheer you up.

[turloughishere.livejournal.com]

Eeeeeeep, Lamp has snared Lance too!!! This is beginning to get really scary! First Chris and now Lance. Is Lamp perhaps a member of the advance infiltration unit of the Alien Master Race(tm)? Have even more celebrities fallen victim to their cunning manipulations? What will be their next step?

[pensnest]

Well, see, I have a 'Light' prompt in my fanfic100 table, so what better use could I possibly make of it?

Heh.

BTW, nopseud reckons there should be a Lava Lamp fic archive with a lurid bubbling animated background. Since you are keeping a list... (gd&r)

[turloughishere.livejournal.com]

A Lamp archive?!?! The idea sounds scarily... attractive for some reason - it really must be an Alien Invasion!! I will think about it :-)

PS I saw Lamp today! He was half-hidden behind the curtain in someone's bedroom window, clearly spying on me as I walked past!! I'm never going by that house again, what if he lurks behind the corner and attacks me next time!!!

[pensnest]

There, there - don't worry! You know he only goes for boys.

At least, I think... um.

[turloughishere.livejournal.com]

That's only because boys are more easily duped! When they have them all in thrall they'll come after us girls too, I just know it! *is beginning to feel very paranoid*

[stellamira]

I saw Lamp today

I saw him today too! He was sitting in the one shop I went to today, and he had multiplied!

[turloughishere.livejournal.com]

It is an alien invasion!! *shudders*

[nopseud]

Bwahahahahahahaaa! Dude, there's a genre being created right here. It's an awesome thing. There really ought to be an archive. (Preferably with an eye-torturing animated bubble background.)

[pensnest]

Frightening, isn't it! As to the archive, I think turloughishere is keeping a list of Lamp fics. Hee!

[bayouskye.livejournal.com]

*shakes head*

*dies laughing*

It was love at first sight.

That I don't doubt one teeny tiny little bit.

;)

LOL!

[pensnest]

Some things are just irresistible. ;-)

[rikes]

Oh boy. Flirting! Who knew that lamp fic would become this popular? ;)

[pensnest]

It's an affliction, certainly. Dear me, and I used to think I was a *serious* writer. Oh well.

[otherdeb.livejournal.com]

You guys are scary, you do know that, yes?

[pensnest]

But Lamp love is such a beautiful thing!

[stellamira]

"Were you flirting —"

Oh my God, I seriously laughed for at least a whole minute here. You know, I think I might have judged Lamp wrong. All this time I thought that he was rather attached to Chris, and Chris was the one who was looking for other options. And now he's flirting with Lance! Tsk tsk.

[pensnest]

Well, we couldn't really blame Chris for looking at JC - and we can't really blame Lamp for looking at Lance, can we?

Thee, and me, and turps33, we're very special people.

[ninjetti75.livejournal.com]

You certainly are.

*turns purple and asphyxiates laughing*


Someone *koffJCkoff* needs to randomly decide to buy a lava lamp "Because they're cool and retro and stuff!" and then... ..be utterly, utterly disturbed by it and foists it off on Justin someone else... ..who may not be as immune to its charms...

wait, is that torrid romance or horror? I've totally list track of the cracked!genre, at this point...

[pensnest]

I hope you are restored to a more proper colour by now ;-)

Story ideas?!!? No!!! Unfair!

Although, it sounds like something that'd be fun to *read*, koff!

[stellamira]

*koff*

I got a little carried away, and it got too long for a comment. So it's over here.

[ninjetti75.livejournal.com]

Ah-HAHAHAAHAHAHAHHAAA!!!

How fun is THAT? Heeeeee.